The Upsetiquette of Table Manners

Sass & Balderdash

When I sit down with a plate of food in front of me, the last thing on my mind is table manners. My thoughts are probably along the lines of quickly inhaling everything on said plate while simultaneously ensuring none of the different food groups touch. …Yes, I’m one of those people.

I’ll be the first to admit I’m not the most elegant or refined lady around, but I’m no uncouth slob, either! I say my pleases and thank yous, and I don’t always belch. But there some finer of points of eating etiquette that I can’t (…really won’t) follow, because they’re really not that offensive. To me.

Eating With Your Mouth Closed
I respectfully disagree. I know this is controversial; no one wants to see my meal being saturated by my saliva and ground up into tiny pieces by my teeth–totally gross, but I have a small mouth, okay?…

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